|
|
|
|
|
He quit smoking just in the nicotine.
Why aren't "coming down with something" and "coming up with something" opposites?
I was in the bakery the other day and I heard the weather report on the radio. It said that there was a chance of sprinkles in the afternoon, so I asked the baker what sprinkles are and she showed me some little pieces of colored sugar. I thought that was the best weather forecast ever. But all it did was rain that day.
news flash: The people of western Chile have decided to secede from the eastern half of the country. The new country will be called Thinland.
In the waining days of the empiye, it sometimes wained vewy, vewy, hahd.
Have you heard about the new self-service oil-change place? ♫I'm going back someday, come what may, to Lube-By-You. (apologies to Roy Orbison)
It is a pronoun with no antecedent.
"Well, that should have given him pause."
"Oh, no, he's still got hands and feet."
♫Yesterday, when I was young
The taste of life was sweet
as Dran-o on my tongue....
Cheetahs nevah prospah.
If Jeri Ryan had married Ernest Borgnine, she would have been Seven of Borgnine.
When in Rome, do as the Romans do; when in Tieland, wear a tie.
Aren't you glad that's over?
